I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Randomize
