Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
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