whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
