yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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