So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
