so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I just gargled with NyQuil
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
