she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize
