is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
