I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
