Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Randomize
