Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize