Whod you bang
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
