She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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