Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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