So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Randomize
