Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
