belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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