and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
There's always time for handjobs
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
