Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
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