it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
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