YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
