me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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