I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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