I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
