I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
