Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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