Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
We need to get me chipped asap
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Randomize
