Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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