i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
