Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
She told me I should be a condom model.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
