I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
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