Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
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