I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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