The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
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