i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize