There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Randomize
