OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
