Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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