So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
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