If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
