i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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