I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize