Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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