Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I need to align my fucking chakras
There are leaves in my underwear?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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