I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
