When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
