we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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