What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
