ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
