My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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He had one of those small greek statue penises
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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