she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
