Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Randomize
